I’m starting to think there are too many people in this world. Slash that, I KNOW there are too many people in this world. I’m not saying I don’t think everyone is unique and special and precious and all that jazz, I’m simply saying we could use a plague.

Overpopulation

Honestly, there are so many people that we are starting to look alike. Doppelgangers springing up everywhere!

Image

It’s easy to start thinking the world is small when you go to the same job, using the same route, eat at the same restaurants, and spend time on Facebook day after day. These things aren’t wrong but they can start to give us a false sense of reality. I’m serious about the Facebook one. Has anyone else experienced this? When two friends from the most distant corners of my past will be friends or “like” each others baby photos. I’m all, “How could those people possibly know each other.” Weird.

I got sidetracked there… ah… yes… OVERPOPULATION.

I went ahead an put the link right there for you. If you click on the word overpopulation ^ and it doesn’t cause a little bit of a panic in you then, well, you’re probably a normal, well adjusted person unlike me.

Maybe I’ve watched too many movies like World War ZOutbreakContagion28 Days LaterChildren of MenI Am Legend, and so on. I’m just fascinated by pandemics, epidemics, syndemics, academics (j/k slipped that one in there to keep you on your toes) just any apocalyptic type of event. And when I say fascinated I mean terrified. Whenever I see masses of people I just see this…

 

 

Hundreds-of-thousands-of-people-crowd-Copacabana-beach-in-Rio-de-Janeiro-waiting-for-the-arrival-of-Pope-Francis-2100133

which leads to this…

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and I don’t have one of these yet..

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or these…

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I’m still waiting on this to arrive…

images

 

And this….

Zombie_5d579b_2010866

 

makes you wonder why they build houses any other way.

I don’t really know where I’m headed with this blog. Babies are cute, maybe just have less? I don’t know.

This person seems to have one solution…

overpopulation-hunger-games

What are your thoughts on overpopulation?

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

 

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Advice, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, Learning, LeMonkey House, overpopulation

What is important to you?

Advice, classy, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, LeMonkey House, Mistakes

Let’s talk about priorities. I’ve personally never been very good at setting them. Priorities speak loudly about what’s important to you. If you claim to love something or someone but they are put behind other things then you are a liar.

So here are some examples of people who make me feel better about myself… LjnLckX pic-dump-36-1 pic-dump-69-10 pic-dump-284-10 pic-dump-324-13 pic-dump-518-10i.chzbgr-1 i.chzbgr-2 i.chzbgr

Now go prioritize.

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

 

People watching is one of my all time favorite things. I think this is a common trait for weirdo, socially awkward introverts such as myself. Writers have attempted from the beginning of time to describe their fellow man. Cavemen used to draw pictures on walls trying to capture the essence of men and women in their natural state. Which, back in those days was probably just a lot of hunting, gathering and celebrating fire making.

Still, after all these years people are still most fascinated by people. Actually, people are most fascinated by themselves, but then other people. Okay, maybe themselves and then food, but then definitely other people. Okay, okay, themselves, food, iPhones, then other people.

Maybe I love people watching because it’s always a unique experience. Maybe it’s because it’s free, or takes the focus off of me which leaves me free to judge other people’s life choices for awhile. It’s definitely not because it’s easier than making real friends…Mom! Whatever the reason, I love it.

There are so many good people watching spots but you have to mix it up or you become that weirdo that is always lingering. The airport is amazing to people watch but for fear of being a suspected terrorist I only take advantage of that spot when I’m actually traveling. The mall is a good one but then there are those pesky kiosk people always trying to curl just one strand of your hair, or put weird lotions on you. I have an idea, how about you don’t touch me stranger, k, thanks. The beach is good but that is for vacation, so I use that time to relax and take a break from the difficult task of people watching. Honestly though you can people watch anywhere.

Where are you right now? The coffee shop? The office? If you are anywhere there are people, stop reading this and just watch them. Give it a few minutes and if nothing happens then you can go back to “working” but if something funny happens let us know.

Now is the perfect time. The weather is starting to get nice again and that means you can go to parks and take advantage of free outside people watching pleasure. I am taking advantage of this beautiful day and sitting by the river and let me tell you it is prime material out today. I have seen the following:

  • A very large man (not fat, just tall and all round huge man) walking a huge great dane which of course had to poo right next to me.
  • The young couple that has been sitting on the banks of the river for a very long time now and obviously haven’t been together too long or the hormones are just raging because they are snuggling so hard it looks like they are feeding on each other.
  • The countless joggers – none of them look to be in very good shape, but it is technically still winter so I will cut them some slack.
  • The group of businessmen who just had to stand right next to me and discuss things a little lady like myself couldn’t possibly understand.
  • The woman who let her toddler (whose tiny legs are apparently faster than her normal human size legs) run into the road, lesson learned (disclaimer – I know this happens and parents try their hardest and since I have no children I will not pass judgement on that one)
  • The policeman who is currently scooping up his horses poo with… I sh** you not (pun intended)… a dustpan. There is a lot of poop involved in my people watching experiences apparently.
  • The family that is obviously on vacation (they could be the real life Griswolds) with a teenage daughter and almost teenage son who aren’t the slightest bit interested in facts about the naval ships. Yet, the daughter (let’s just call her Audrey) seems to be finding tons of stuff to Instagram anyway.
  • The young men, and not so young men, that seem to think it is totally acceptable to gargle their snot and spit anywhere they want… guess what? You’re gross and everyone hates you.
  • The older gentlemen, who reminds me of Sean Connery, that has been sitting on the bench across the courtyard from me, doing his share of people watching. In between the naps he has been taking of course.
  • And lastly, rounding off the day, Chris, the homeless man, who sat right next to me on the bench, despite the many other perfectly good benches available. He waited a very long time before telling me how impressive I was for being able to type so quickly. He also stated rather loudly as a large group of people passed that he has 6 girls, and then after what seemed to be a eternity, clarified those girls are his daughters. I’m fairly confident half of this town thinks I work for Chris now, servicing the men here. Thanks Chris.

So that was my day of people watching. I would keep going but the birds are starting to act weird over my head and I fear more poop will be in store if I stay here. Also, the empty can of Vienna Sausages left behind by Chris is starting to smell.Image www.le-monkeyhouse.com

Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, LeMonkey House

Almost a rant, in my sweatpant. (yes sweatpant, so it rhymes.)

Advice, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, LeMonkey House, Monkeys

I can’t take credit for it, but somehow I always seem to be able to find the most the most random stuff on the internet. I think I use search engines wrong. Here are some of my finds today…

jay-z-beyonce-courtside-1

 

random-owl Random+Stuff_5834e4_3171160

 

469810657_1374278962 images

 

There is so much stuff online, a lot of it is crap, but there are always people creating……. which we love. Still, I can’t help but wonder how these people have time. I mean that broccoli tree house is adorable, but I have to go to the bank and the grocery store and call my insurance company, ya know? That hippo is really cool, but photoshopping isn’t exactly what I want to do in my down time.

I feel we are advancing quickly technologically, too quickly for me to keep up with anyway, but at the same time our style and taste may just be getting a little worse. I mean Spongebob Squarepants is still really popular. Fashion, while I don’t claim to have a lot of taste in this area, I feel like people are trying to look bad. Stop spending a bunch of money to look homeless. Oh no, I feel this blog quickly turning into a rant.

Back to photos!….

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Okay, I’m stopping for today. I’m starting to feel like my grandmother who thinks everything on the internet is amazing and emails me everyday with these “amazing” things she finds. I do have to give her credit for staying with the times better than I could ever hope to. (Disclaimer, my dearest Grandmother, if you see this, I mean it with LOVE) Personally, I fully intend on succumbing to old age and all the excuses that become available to me. Wheelchairs, early bird specials, handicap parking, “forgetting” things, naps, senior discounts, and rockin’ the sweatpants and white sneaks everywhere!

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

 

Tired of Hollywood’s lies? Well here is the truth.

Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, Learning, LeMonkey House, Uncategorized

images

So I stumbled upon this YouTube channel today. Channel, Station, Page…what is it called?! Oh, who cares.

Enjoy…

These videos, while slightly offensive, really had me laughing. I love movies and would never bash most of these. (except Twilight, they deserved what they got) Still, you can’t deny that there is a little truth in these “trailers”. For me it even pointed out things I didn’t realize so in a way we can call this educational. You’re welcome.

 

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

 

I got 99 problems and Sochi has way more than that…

beer, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, LeMonkey House

I’m a little late on the post today, obviously. There are so many things I want to write about but well, let’s just say I’m feeling lazy. Call me Sochi….Bf69imwIcAAVvLx

read about some of the issues here…

SOCHI 

and here…

SOCHI

and here…

SOCHI

I mean I’m bummed I couldn’t get my act together to give you something better than this. I can’t imagine how Putin is feeling. Ehhh he seems ok…

BN-BL748_SLIDEP_P_20140211103651 url

 

What the hell is going on over there?

 

 

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

Calling all LOVAHS

Advice, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, Learning, LeMonkey House, party, Posters

Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone!

I don’t have much advice to give when it comes to love and relationships, but I know couple of lovahs who know a thing or two…

LOVAHS

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http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

 

The good, the bad, and the single.

Advice, Canvas, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, Holiday, LeMonkey House, Posters

So as you are probably well aware, Valentines Day is tomorrow. And as you could probably tell from my Bitches Love Teddy Bears post I’m not a big fan of the holiday.

Maybe it’s my distaste for the color pink (not all girls like pink, take note sporting equipment makers!), maybe it’s the generic cards and gifts, maybe because it’s a day of forced affection, maybe it’s that the cheesy factor is off the charts, or maybe it’s because I’m single and bitter. Who knows! Whatever the reason I don’t know why people like this day. I do know when you google Valentines Day you get this garbage. yuk.

Still, for all of you lovers out there I will attempt to keep things positive, soooooo….

Here are 10 things that make Valentines Day seem almost bearable…

10. Gifts…

gifts-grandma

…everyone likes to give and receive gifts.

9. An excuse to be sappy…

imgres

…and watch any chic flick you want. (yes, dudes secretly like these)

8. Hugs and Kisses…

hugs-kiss-love-romance-couple-kisses-9fd42706e98913ee3764dd98a9bb91f2-h-jpg

or this…

url

…whatever best describes you and your significant other

7. Chocolate…

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… it’s great for singles too!

6. Because the store aisles now look like this…

imgres-1 walgreensIMG_4267

… soft and covered with chocolate… umm yea I said it.

And now I’m out of reasons why Valentines Day is good… so for all you singles out there here are some things to keep you happy…

5. These two are back on the market…

51b226f972cc655995_beautiful-celebrities bloom_orlando

or if you’re a little bit of a freak…legolas

4. Freedom to read books, or let’s be real… have sole control over the remote…

images

3. Beyonce…

2. Paul Westerberg and the amazing movie Singles…

1. The number one spot is reserved for all scorned lovers out there…

and no one does it better than JT….

 

In case you are a little behind and need an amazing gift to make up for it go here….

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

My book page poster is smarter than your honor student…

Canvas, Design Studio, graphic design, LeMonkey House, Posters

20140212-203827.jpg

Okay, I know the blog title doesn’t make any sense but…
I realized today that maybe I haven’t featured our book pages yet!

These posters are one of my favorite designs here at Le Monkey House.

Get your hands on one of these beauties here:

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com

Bitches love teddy bears.

Advice, classy, Comedy, Design Studio, graphic design, LeMonkey House

I can’t wait for Valentines Day. It’s totes my favesies. I think every girl feels the samsies. I mean what’s better than hearts, chocolates (oh, I hope I don’t look fat!), mixed CDs filled with sexy songs, the color pink, and of course TEDDY BEARS! It’s always been a dream of mine that Prince Charming would ride up to my door and present me with a big teddy bear.
It’s scientifically proven that beautiful bubbly blondes, brunettes, and red heads around the world love huge teddy bears. No girl could resist something that would take up that much space. It would give me something to cuddle with at night when I’m missing my prince. I know all my ladies will agree, ALL of us women LOVE snuggling ALL the time. This huge teddy bear will make sure I don’t have to go a single second without hugging and latching onto something. Girls need security, again, it’s science. Then, when my man finally does get home, after I’ve been daydreaming about him all day, I will be in bed waiting for him with my insanely huge teddy bear! oh yea…
The people at Vermont Teddy Bear have really done their research and figured out the way to a woman’s heart. I know my man really had me in mind when he picked out my 4+ foot teddy bear. Go on guys get the big reward you deserve and give YOUR woman what she has always secretly desired, a teddy bear.

ps.  Vermont Teddy Bear – you. are. the. worst.

pss. This is why relationships end.

 

Or maybe you could think outside that incredible small box of yours….

http://www.le-monkeyhouse.com